horay for low blood sugar!!....wait, what?

I think I can now say with utmost confidence that I am successfully a breastfeeding mommy. This is mucho gusto for so many reasons, and it's bringing me such joy in others.

I explain.

For some odd, unexplained reason, nursing is causing my body to have troubles regulating my blood sugar. Every day I get these massive headaches and turn into Cruella DeVil. My cure?? Eating bites of cake icing throughout my day. I'm telling you what, no more headaches, no more children crying "mommy is mean!" plus I get to nosh on icing!!!

Another plus: Ozzie Bear gets really colicky at night {this is not the plus, in case you're thinking I'm a cruel, evil mommy} what is a way to ease this problem?? Drink a beer a couple of hours before the last night feeding. Works like a charm, and mom gets to relax a bit in the evening!! The only bummer about this is that the alcohol can cause a reduction in milk production (though the hops help increase it..how's that for contradictory} so I primarily have to drink NA beer.....it pretty much tastes like pee in a bottle. Everyone once in a while I'll indulge in the Fat Tire, but other wise I'm stuck with Busch NA........watch me NOT be enthusiastic about that.....but hay, I'll take the occasional Fat Tire with no complaints!!

 

The Big Move

Well, I did it.

I moved Owen into his crib in the boys' room for full time.

For the past two weeks I've been having him take some of his naps in the crib to get him used to it, and he never had any problems. Finally, for the last four days he's not slept in the Pack N Play we had behind our bedroom door even once, so it was time to put it away.

It is just as heartbreaking as it was with the first two kids. I don't know why, but I was sort of thinking that it would be easier, being that this is the third time I've had to do it, but no. My chest feels a little tight still, just knowing that even if I wanted to, now I can't even sneak him in in the middle of the night.

It makes me anxious.

We play music for the kids at night when they go to bed, and the baby monitor picks that up so easily because of the volume, that I can't have it turned up too loud or it keeps me awake, so I can't even hear him breathing through it.

That is one thing that keeps me calm at night, hearing him breathe across the room, or hearing the little noises he makes in his sleep, the gasps as he catches his breath, the squeaks from his dreams, or the rustling as he shifts position. These things may not seem like much, but without them I feel lost.

I know that it is so very important for him to be in his own bed, in his own room. I don't want to deal with the issues of trying to make this transition when he's 2 and screams and cries. We always agreed not to co-sleep or to let them sleep in our room for more than a few weeks in the beginning for exactly that reason, but how I wish I could!!

With Vin, since he was so sick for such a long time, he slept in our bed or just in our room in his bouncing seat quite frequently, because I was so afraid of him having a complication while he slept, and it's haunted me. Now, at 2 1/2 years, we still have kicking screaming fits when he tries to sneak into bed with us at night, or trying to get him to take a nap in his own bed.

It's torture.

I know it's for the best, both for us and for Oz, but that doesn't make it any easier.

I've made his crib into a cozy little nest for him, though. I've arranged a HUGE {made for a Cal King bed} soft fleece blanket so that when he lays in it, it cradles him like a nest. He sleeps in that when he sleeps on his sides. Next to "the nest" there is a {rather deflated, for safety purposes} pillow draped with a plush towel for him to sleep on his tummy. He prefers to have his legs tucked up under him, so when he's on the pillow, gravity helps keep his legs curled up, he loves it. It also helps to keep him from spitting up after meals.

Seeing that he sleeps so well in the crib helps a little bit. At least I know he's comfortable, and being comfy makes him happy.

Now all I have to do is find my happy place.

                 Oz sleeping in his "nest"

Mushroom Lasagna

If you like mushrooms, you're gonna love this recipe. It's so full of flavors, it practically explodes in your mouth!! I'm putting together my grocery list and I'm hoping I can budget enough to get all the ingredients I need to make it. I may very well start to cry if I can't!!

MUSHROOM LASAGNA

SAUCE

• 5 tablespoons unsalted butter
• 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
• 4 cups warm whole milk
• 1 cup (4 ounces) shredded smoked mozzarella cheese
• 1/2 cup (2 ounces) grated Parmesan
• Pinch ground nutmeg
• 8 ounces thinly sliced prosciutto, coarsely chopped
• 1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt, plus extra, as needed
• 2 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper, plus more, as needed

FILLING

• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 3 tablespoons unsalted butter, at room temperature
• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt, plus extra, as needed
• 2 teaspoons freshly ground black pepper, plus more for seasoning
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 1/2 pounds assorted mushrooms, such as cremini, shiitake and button, quartered
• 1 1/2 tablespoons chopped fresh rosemary leaves
• 1 1/2 tablespoons chopped fresh thyme leaves
• 9 spinach-flavored or plain lasagna noodles
• 1 cup (4 ounces) shredded smoked mozzarella cheese
• 1/2 cup (2 ounces) grated Parmesan
• Olive oil, for drizzling

COOKING DIRECTIONS

Put an oven rack in the center of the oven. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F. Butter a 13 by 9 by 2-inch baking dish. Set aside.

Sauce: In a 2-quart saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat.
Add the flour and whisk until smooth.
Gradually add the warm milk, whisking constantly to prevent lumps.
Simmer over medium heat, whisking constantly, until the sauce is thick and smooth, about 8 minutes (do not allow the mixture to boil).
Remove the pan from the heat and add the cheeses and nutmeg.
Stir until the cheeses have melted and the sauce is smooth.
Add the prosciutto, 1 tablespoon salt and 2 teaspoons pepper.
Filling: In a large skillet, heat the oil and butter over medium-high heat.
Add the onion, season with salt and pepper, to taste, and cook, stirring frequently until soft, about 5 to 6 minutes.
Add the garlic and cook until aromatic, about 30 seconds.
Add the mushrooms, rosemary and thyme and season with salt and pepper, to taste.
Cook, stirring occasionally, until the mushrooms are golden and the liquid has evaporated, about 8 to 10 minutes.
Add 1 tablespoon salt and 2 teaspoons pepper.
Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil over high heat.
Add the noodles and cook until tender but still firm to the bite, stirring occasionally, about 8 to 10 minutes.
Drain and set aside.
To assemble the lasagna: Ladle 1/2 cup of the sauce over the bottom of the prepared baking dish. Lay 3 pasta noodles on top.
Spoon 1/2 of the mushroom mixture on top of the pasta.
Ladle 1 cup of the sauce over the mushroom mixture and lay 3 more noodles on top.
Repeat the layers using the remaining mushroom mixture, 1 cup of sauce and the remaining 3 noodles. Top with the remaining sauce and sprinkle with 1 cup smoked mozzarella cheese and 1/2 cup Parmesan.
Drizzle the top with olive oil and bake until the top is golden and the filling is bubbling about 35 to 40 minutes.
Remove from the oven and cool for 5 minutes.
Cut the lasagna into wedges and serve.

 

Why Having Toddlers is Like Being at a Frat Party

This is borrowed from Suburban Snapshots


10. There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.

9. There's always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.

8. It's best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.

7. You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone's going to start banging on the door.

6. Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.

5. You've got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.

4. There's definitely going to be a fight.

3. You're not sure whether anything you're doing is right, you just hope it won't get you arrested.

2. There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere.

1. You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there.


Your additions?

Dad's Day, B-Day, Old Man

Today is more than Father's Day in our house hold. Today is also my beloved daughter's 5th birthday. Five years ago today I was laying in my hospital bed, looking at that tiny baby in total disbelief that she came from me. God blessed us in such a sudden, unexpected way with Theren. I had a very hard time after her delivery, and though my recovery took nearly two months, it allowed me to pretty much do nothing but lay in bed and hold her, look at her, touch her face and kiss her. Our relationship has changed as she has gotten older {and more independent, thinking she's the boss} but she will forever be my baby girl. I started this thing with her a few years ago, when she was learning how to say her name. I say "hey, who's my girl?" and she says "Theren". It's not much but when things are hard and we're fighting, I'll take a minute to say that, and I can see her face lighten. I hope one day she'll understand exactly how much she means to me. She saved me from unknown mistakes in my young adult-hood and for that she is all the more amazing.

Now on to Daddy's Day. I have two men to celebrate today. My dad. The most patient, loving, generous and humble man I know. For all the shitake I pulled on that man, he returned it all with nothing but love. He taught me how to build model airplanes, how movies work, how to change a tire, and more importantly, how to negotiate. He spoiled the crap outta me and I love him so much for it all. He's sacrificed more than I know to make sure I had everything I needed and most of what I wanted. I'm lucky that my kids get to grow up in his house, just as I did. I hope they learn even more from him than I did.
As for Dominick, I know no other man who has grown more than him. Being a father has made him a better man, and I see it every day. I'm blessed that he chose to stick around when we got pregnant with Tay, and I'm even more grateful that he works so hard to make sure that we are never in want or need of anything. He loves his kids more than life itself. He would give anything for any one of them. It breaks his heart having to work every day because he would rather stay home and play with them. I love watching them all wrestle together, hearing their laughter as Dom tickles them.

On a far more random note, we both commented the other day on how odd it is that our 14-day-old baby looks like an 80-year-old man. I thought I'd share this photo of him with you all. It cracks me up....old man.

breastfeeding 'ventures

Well, it's been 12 days since Oz was born and I think I can say with confidence that I am successfully breastfeeding. We take him in for his 2-week check-up on Friday, and I'll learn then if he is gaining sufficient weight. {my daughter had to be supplemented with formula for a week before I lost my supply} So I'm hoping that doesn't happen again. I'm actually really starting to get a hang of this thing, though. I can tell when it's time to feed him by how my tata's feel, but I'm still trying to figure out the art of feeding from under a blanket, for when we're in a public place. Next pay day we're going to be ordering my electric pump 'cuz right now I only have a hand pump. I've started a storage of milk in the freezer, which I'm excited about, and I'm trying like Abe to stay appropriately hydrated and stress-free. {the two things that my doctor says make a huge difference in upkeeping a decent supply}


I'm so very proud of myself for doing this! Not just because it's cheaper and saving our family an awful lot of money, but because I was not able to breastfeed my first two. I feel that it's sort of a right of passage for motherhood, to be able to breastfeed for at least 6 months.

I'm also starting to discover the pro's and con's of BFing. One very HUGE pro is the fact that now, only 12 days post pardum, I fit back into my pre-pregnancy clothes for the most part. One of the biggest con's is that no one can help feed. My poor husband feels a little bit useless this time around, not being able to partake in the feeding and bonding. I tell him he can make up for by changing poopy diapers. {which he does voluntarily.} Although it does feel like all I do is feed this baby. It takes about half of an hour for him to have both sides, including burping in between, then the diaper change and some kisses, and by the time it's all done if feels like I only have an hour before I do it all over again....but really I have closer to two. It certainly makes it more challenging when it take 40 minutes just to drive into town for groceries or what-not. But like I said, we're figuring it out. We're gonna be pro's in no time, just you wait and see!!

Things You Never Want to Hear

Here are a few things that no one, no matter where they are in their walk of life, ever wants to hear....

"uh oh" from the bathroom

"oh Mommy, you better come see this!"

"How good is your insurance?"

"Where's the glue?" as your toddler peers out behind a closed bedroom door

"uh....is dinner supposed to smell like this??"

 "did you get the baby?" as you're driving away

"You have my wallet, right?" at the checkout stand of the grocery store

new life

I'm finally starting to adjust to my new day-to-day life. Instead of coping with Preschool, potty training, taunting contractions, herniated bellybuttons and heartburn, I now spend my days prepping for Kindergarten and dealing with poopy diapers, pacifiers, burp rags, sore boobs, aching back, kissing 2-year-olds and clocks. I have to tell you, I love every second of it. Oz is a wonderful baby. He's very laid back and spends most of his day lounging in his "rocky" (a rocking vibrating chair) out on the deck getting sunshine and fresh air.

The kids are handling the adjustments really well, too. Tay has a hard time leaving him be while he's sleeping, but she tells me when he's fussing or if he's awake from his naps. Vin would sit in front of Oz and kiss him all day long if we let him. He always wants to give hugs or kisses, and he loves to rub Oz's head and comment about how soft he is.

I'm also really really really excited about how well breastfeeding is going. I was unable to breastfeed my other two, but this time around I was determined to do it and by golly, I'm doing it!! He eats every 2 to 3 hours during the day and at night he's only been getting up once to eat. Last night was amazing, his last feeding was at 9 pm, and he didn't wake up again until 3 am. Then this morning I had to wake him up at 6 to start our daily schedule. I discovered that if I wrap him up in a plush blanket for s "pseudo-swaddle", he sleeps much much better at night. I think it's because that keeps him nice and snuggly warm. We'll try it again tonight and see if we get similar results.

There certainly is much that has changes since Oz came home, but we're all handling it and adjusting as we need to. Overall I really have absolutely nothing to complain about the whole thing. I mean sure, there are certain things that are less-than appealing like the cramps and the inflamed back from my epidural, but I'll take the discomfort from those two things any day for the joy and beauty of newly enlarged family.

He's Finally Here!!!

I don't have a whole lot of time or energy, so this is going to be a quickie. I just wanted to let you all know that Owen Zechariah is here and healthy!!

We ended up going into the hospital Thursday night just to be sent home an hour later (surprise surprise). They gave me an Ambien to help me sleep and said see you in the morning. I went to sleep around 10 pm and woke up at 4 am in REAL labor. My contractions were stifling. I felt like I was splitting in half. We got to the hospital and hour before our scheduled induction and after a total of 5 hours in active labor, it was time to push!!

Oz decided to make it a bit more challenging for me, though, and was facing my side as he came through the birth canal, so we had to spend a little bit of time turning him, but once he was face down he came flying out. Literally I hear.

He weighed 8 pounds 12 ounces and is 20 3/4 inches long and has a full head of hair. He looks exactly like my daughter did when she was born, he's just too darn cute!!

We're home now, enjoying every bit of him and getting to know each other better. Breastfeeding is going remarkably well so far (keep your fingers crossed that it stays that way) and he's currently on a great schedule. 2 1/2 to 3 hours during the day and 4 hours at night, which means I get some decent sleep at night!!

We're all very excited to finally have Oz here, and the kids both are loving to help out and give him lots of kisses. I'll post more photos later, but for now, here is our new little boy!!

Last post for a while????

We're getting ready to put the kids to bed and watch a movie before hitting the hay ourselves, and I don't know when I'll have another opportunity to blog again after Owen is born, so I am taking this chance to say to everyone, Thank you.

Thanks for reading and supporting me through this somewhat hellish pregnancy. It's been long and hard, and although I've had so many rough patches, I've had so many "ups" as well. It will all have been worth it tomorrow when we finally get to hold our boy, and I can hear Dominick say "hello Owen, I'm your daddy."

As of right now my contractions are about 5 minutes apart and a 7 on the pain scale. If they continue then we're headed off to the hospital tonight. I'm fighting it but both Dom and my mom are pretty determined to make me go. I just don't want to go back there to be sent home AGAIN. I don't have much say in the matter, though.

So I'll post again as a new mommy with pictures for all when I get a chance.

Our Last Day as 4

Today is officially our last day as a family of four. Starting some time tomorrow we'll be a family of five.

Oh my goodness!!

I'm still trying to accept that reality. 3 kids. I must be out of my mind.

After all the turmoil and drama of this pregnancy, I can't wait to get this little guy outta me and into this world. We thought we were going to meet him yesterday, but that didn't work out. At my appointment on Tuesday my doctor stripped my membranes, and by 11 that night I was having contractions every 10 minutes. We went to the hospital, and after staying all night they sent me home because I was not dilating any further than 2.5. I cried like a baby. Once again we did the walk of shame to the exit. I struggled for the whole rest of the day, I am so tired and uncomfortable, I just want him out!!

I've continued to have contractions every 8 minutes since then. I was up all night with them. I doubt anything will come of it today, so right now I'm focusing on counting down the hours until I can go to bed tonight, because tomorrow is the day. AT LAST.

The nurses promised me that no matter what, when I go in tomorrow, I'm not leaving without my baby boy in my arms. This is very comforting.

So now I must find things to occupy my time, thus making it feel like time is going faster, because I'm anxious and excited and so DONE.

Can I Please Start Over?

This morning has been a rough one. I know we all have those days when we wake up and everything seems to be more complicated than it should be, and we just want to crawl back into bed for an hour or so and then start all over anew.

Today is that day for me.

First off, despite what my brain has been telling me since checking the clock at 4:30 this morning, it is Tuesday, not Monday. Tuesday. TUESDAY. IT IS TUESDAY!!! 

Now, because my brain has been telling me Monday, I slept in too late and missed Bible Study with my mom. Don't get me wrong, I've only gone once, and that was the week after Tay got out from school so I was used to waking up earlier and getting my day going, but since Summer has officially arrived here, it seems all of us are on a lazy sleep mode. Even little Vin has had a few days of sleeping until 8:30!! So unless I program my brain the night before, I won't wake up for anything other than a crying child.

Which brings me to the next item of today's messed-up list.

When Vin gets up before I'm ready to be up, I turn on one of his two favorite movies. Today was CARS. He gets to watch the movie while I rest in bed for a while longer, we both win. Well, today went fine until I felt breath on my face, and rolled over to find Vin hovering over me, whispering : pooh pooh, mommy. Ok, no problem. Time to get up. Not that easy.  He had poohed out his diaper and had tried to wipe it up...with his fingers.  Gross.  Nasty.  So wrong.  So I did my very best attempt of jumping up out of bed at 39 weeks pregnant and ran to get him cleaned up. He's been having some not-so-pleasant diapers for the last three days and now is raw in all places that no boy ever wants to be raw. So the cleaning included lots of screaming in pain. I felt bad for the poor guy, but my recently awakened ears felt rather attacked.

Getting Tay up out of bed was the first smooth thing that happened. We grabbed the milk and headed upstairs (to where the main kitchen is) for some cereal. Breakfast went fairly well, Vin kept trying to convince me that my food was better and therefore should be consumed by him rather than me, but this happens at nearly every meal. After we ate I washed the dishes then started unloading our dishwasher. I wanted to wait until later, but I thought it would be nice for my mom to come home and see that I had taken care of it, sort of a "I'm so sorry I slept through Bible Study" gesture. As I unloaded the breakable objects, Vin collected the plastic things and put the silverware away....hes quite the helper. He was reaching to grab a glass cup when I stopped him, knocking over one of Dominick beloved pint glasses and breaking it. When i say "beloved pint glasses" you may have laughed, but you shouldn't have. People don't really understand exactly how much he loves those glasses. He collects them when he's on the road for work. He has several, and they are perfect for him to drink his tea in, or pour a glass of soda into with some ice. They are very special. Only recently have I been able to use one without hearing grief for it. It's an honor.

So I broke one. The one from Flagstaff Brew Company in Arizona. I felt horrible. I had to call right away and confess so that he would be prepared. Naturally he was fine with it, and actually sounded confused as to why I was so upset, but still, I felt better having told him as soon as it happened.

Then we gathered up our "downstairs stuff" and toted it down. Tay carried the stack of tupperware, and Vin carried the cups...I carried the milk and the one remaining pint glass I managed NOT to break. Vin put the cups on the table when we got down, and Tay decided to build a tower. Of course the tupper ware bowls had to go on the bottom for sturdiness, but it wasn't sturdy, and as she walked away the whole thing came tumbling down.

This may not seem like a horrible thing, but let me tell you. When you are as ginormous as I am, and lack sleep, and are recovering from a nasty eye infection, and are fighting of a lung infection, and are Generally Irritable Due to Life, such a small things feels like the end of the world.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to shout and kick my feet.

AAARRRGGGGHHHHH

I'm over it now, though.

Can I please hit the RESTART button? Can I claim that this was a practice round, that I was just warming up for the real thing?? Please?

No?

Fine.....be that way.

I'll just put on my big-girl panties and deal with it like an adult. >sigh<